Bad Habits I’d Like to (NOT) Leave Behind in 2017
There comes a time in a girl’s life where she must accept her flaws and accept that she is stuck. Can I just say, I’m trying to be a better person every day but there are some habits I may have come to terms with. I hope to drop them in 2017 but I’m not optimistic.
Look, it is not of him that willeth…
1. Hating on people who can remember quotes off their heads: We’re having a conversation and the next thing I hear is “even Socrates said in 1900” or “according to Dele Giwa in 1910”. Excuse me wee you keep chut?! Trying to make me look dull and everything. Typical me will nod and in my head, I’m trying to remember a matching quote that’s as powerful and archaic but no, it doesn’t come to me. So I’m left feeling like the less intelligent person. I really don’t like people like this and I’ve tried to appreciate instead of hate but I’ve come to terms with the fact that human encyclopedias will forever be in my bad books.
2. Turning the sound down in my car when it’s dark out while looking for a house — as if that’ll somehow improve my vision: I catch myself doing this and tell myself how ridiculous it is but I still do it anyway.
3. Sarcasm: I think I may have been ‘born this way’
4. Pride: I used to have really flat bum but some years ago The good Lord answered my prayers and blessed my squats. Here I am, a slim girl with some bumbum to go. Shouldn’t I be more understanding of people with a flat bum? No. I’m just full of pride and in my mind I look at them like…”WOW, that’s something of a flat bum!”. Is it their fault? No. Could they do squats like me and pray to God? yea!
Okay, I need to do better.
5. Leaving my fuel tank to show the ‘red’ sign before refueling: I panic every time this happens but I keep doing it. Sigh…
6.Late night snacking: As you may have read, this has put me in trouble before. That time I mistakenly rubbed pepper on my jaijaina while making mid-night noodles. If that didn’t stop me from midnight snacking I wonder what will. How does one write without snacking on plantain chips or goat meat and noodles? Who does that?
7. “I’ll be there in 5 minutes”: That will be the day!
8. Humming to myself: When I’m seated at a reception waiting to see a client or just on the queue at the ATM or at the teal waiting to pay, I hum to myself. This is like me keeping myself entertained but it draws attention to me, this is when I notice and then stop. Sometimes I’m a rebel though, like “please can I entertain myself? is it your humming?’, so I don’t stop.
9. Eavesdropping and giving my opinion in my mind: What’s a girl to do when I’m making my hair and stylists are talking about their love lives? Turn off my brain? I’ll try that in 2018