Yesterday, I was at the screening of Ego Boyo’s Movie, “A Hotel Called Memory”. After the screening, there was an after party which was attended by a lot of people I was glad to meet. During the party, I saw this woman who has achieved great things and whom I admire greatly. Not only because of her achievements but because of her continuous advocacy for “girl power” and “women supporting women”.
When I saw that she was leaving, I also bid my friends good bye and quickly rushed out after her to introduce myself and let her know how much of an influence she was to me and how proud I was of everything she’s accomplished.
“Hello ma’am, it’s so nice to meet you. I am such a huge admirer of everything you’ve been able to accomplish and the standard you’ve set for women so far…” I said in excitement. She responded with an indulgent smile as she quickly looked at me head to toe. She seemed to be satisfied with my looks so asked me for my name. I told her. She asked for my surname, I mentioned that to her as well. She couldn’t make any connection of it so she said, “What do you do? You never mentioned”.
“Oh. I’m so sorry. I’m a blogger” In a playful whisper I said to her “I run a blog called Diaryofanaijagirl. Keep my secret”.
I was excited. Beaming from ear to ear.
“Oh. I can’t chat right now though” She walked away from me as she said this.
I heard the lady in her company say as they both walked away, “Ah you don’t know Diaryofanaijagirl?”
She responded in her native language, “Is that one a blog? Somebody that’s just fooling around”. They both giggled as they got into the elevator. I immediately turned around and pretended to walk back into the party.
I could not wrap my head around the fact that someone whom I have respected from afar, who is all about women supporting women and girl power would say such discouraging words. I was so discouraged that I saw no point in posting any of my articles this morning. I combed through my website and IG page, asking myself if what I was doing was really fooling around, looking for evidence that she was right.
I didn’t allow myself to stay in that spot for too long though, it’s not just who I am.
This was a difficult time in my story, and I almost lost faith in myself because someone whose opinion mattered had made a negative statement about me. I’ve heard some negative things said about my work but I never cared, why did I let this affect me so much?
I told myself I I’m in control of two things for sure: How I prepare for what might happen and how I respond to what just happened.
Is one statement from one person supposed to overturn all I’ve done and all I intend to do?
Even though I’m in the development process, my determination to leave this world and as much people in it way better than they were before they met me still stands. I have clarity now, that if that lady’s words can’t discourage me, then nothing can.
I am a co-creator of my life and I have chosen to march forward.
I will keep getting better and soon, no one, not even big madam will accuse me of fooling around.