Forget What People Want. It’s Your Life. What Do You Want?

Photo credit: Elena Ayodeleye 8 May 30, 2017 By Dang

Everyone is quick to tell you what to do and how to do it. Admittedly, their advice is coming from a good place, It’s Your Life. What Do You Want?

When I wanted to resign from employment, no one, not even my dad encouraged me initially. Everyone was afraid for me, they wanted to keep me safe and secure in employment. But I was miserable, I wanted to do better, even though there was no assurance of success, I had confidence in God and myself. What did I want? I wanted to own my own business and find fulfilment in working tirelessly for myself.

What did I do? I prayed, felt peace in my heart and resigned. No one was happy, I was. Those who asked me not to resign, are quick to tell everyone today how proud they are of me

I remember when I almost got married to the wrong person. I had collected money for Aso-Ebi, MC had been paid, sugar band had been paid, hall was paid for but I knew deep in my heart If I went along with it, I would regret it. What did everyone else want? They wanted me to worry about my age, to try it and see if love will come later, some of my friends wanted to wear aso-ebi

What did I want? I wanted out, I wanted to stop choking in my sleep knowing the magnitude of mistake I was about to make. I wanted to marry for love. I wanted to stop crying every day. What did I do? I called it off. No amount of money was worth my happiness. Today, I couldn’t be more proud of myself

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I started this blog to tell my story, and hoped that in time, people would trust me enough to tell theirs too. My very dear friend told me, “no one will pay attention to your blog if you don’t include gossip. Just mix things up a little”. That wasn’t what I wanted but I was almost tempted to do it. My friend didn’t mean any harm, he just wanted to stop seeing me write everyday and only my friends noticing the hard work.

Then, I asked myself, “Is this who you are? Is this what you want?” I hate gossip, I believe only small minds indulge so I stuck to what I wanted: To portray myself, as I was, and as I wanted to be. Today, my friend couldn’t agree more that that was bad advice

What do you want? Not what others want. You. Who are you deep in your heart? Life isn’t an exam, there are no model answers but what you must understand is that doing what is right for you is a definite pathway to getting the answers you want. For the rest of your life, you will continue to feel more inadequate and unsure of yourself until you step into your own.

Don’t be deceived, life sucks! The path you know in your heart is right for you may not be easy or smooth, or both. But this is the path you have chosen, if you ride the waves, I can assure you, you will arrive at shore in victory

“I had no idea that being your authentic self could make me as rich as I’ve become. If I had, I’d have done it a lot earlier” —Oprah Winfrey


8 comments on “Forget What People Want. It’s Your Life. What Do You Want?

  1. Bounty

    Lord knows I’m working on doing what’s just right for me everyday but being fully dependent on your parents makes things a little bit harder.I’ve gone from being depressed because of poor degree choices to living a totally different life(in a good way) in the space of one year. This happened after I got the balls to admit that I was miserable and told it to my very African parents. The gist is long and I don’t want to give out all the details just yet because I’m still a work in progress.
    For everyone out there living miserably and almost choking because of the thought of “what will people say”, just remember that as long as humans have mouths people will always talk. Take the bull by the horns and watch your success shut everybody up. Life is beautiful, don’t spend all your years being miserable.


  2. Anonymous

    I connect with you in a lot of ways. Thanks for sharing these inspiring thoughts about urself. I particularly like the quote ” For the rest of your life, you will continue to feel more inadequate and unsure of yourself until you step into your own”.



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